From a Few Invaluable Experiences

I worked numerous jobs, and over the years I’ve gained quite a few skill sets. And what I’ve precariously learned, is that I am my own business. Think about it; the time and the work I put in under employment, is also the time I’ve conditioned myself and built confidence in that experience. There are certain details you learn from each and every employer, down to the nitty-gritty. Experiences I’ve been exposed to, from mopping tiled floors to updating websites for board members. Jobs that required immediate action—a sense of urgency. Yet, other fields that require preparation, analytical work. However, it took me quite some time to realize this and I am in the early stages of this innovative thought process. So, I’ll share a thang or two on what I’ve learned from different jobs and as the old adage goes, “it’s what you make it”.

“Add It To The Toolbox”

During my four years in the Marine Corps, I’ve always come across the phrase, “Add it to the toolbox”. Even during boot camp as a naive recruit, my drill instructor (the knowledge hat one), would give the platoon a few pointers on how to handle a rifle for drill. Invaluable knowledge, telling us boys, treat the rifle with respect as you would with your girl—now add that information to your toolbox. Scrolling pass the semi-objectifying analogy, one of my Sergeants advised, take all the traits you value from leadership, and add it to your personal toolbox.

In this crafty metaphor, the toolbox is my mind, and I have the choice to reference past advice. Advice I choose to hold in my head. Yet I’ve learned, even as tools go bad, so does advice, information. Every situation is unique, and it’s up to me on what tools I utilize to troubleshoot it. The more tools in the toolbox, the more options. But I also relish the fact of keeping the toolbox decluttered and organized.

“Observe and Report”

There are moments I’ve learned, I can not intervene in every situation—especially a hostile one. Sometimes standing firm and silent is the best way to de-escalate a hostile situation. A tactic I’ve learned while doing security. 

It was a surprise during orientation, when I was told as a security officer, I am only to observe and report. Ah, what an effective methodology. If I were to have actually practiced this during my 20’s, I’d be completing my master’s right now. Unfortunately, I’ve learned this at the age of 23, and ten years later I’m realizing how effective this is.

Some from the streets would say, I was being paid to snitch. Others would suggest, be selective in what information to share. It’s an art. However, the science behind it is to observe and take mental notes. Goes back to that military mentality; be situationally aware and notify your comrades on the useful information. Also for the record, one should report without the malicious intention to hurt anyone undeserving of it.

“What Will The Fruits Of My Work Yield”

As a factory worker in the industry of manufacturing ceramics, it was very important on how I’d set up shop. I would have to determine (if assigned on multiple machines), which machine to use and how to meet the number of parts to produce. I’d be mindful of what the environment would hold—hot or cold, determining the humidity of the setting. 

If there was a lack of preparation, the parts I’d produce would come out poor in quality, or the machine would break down. Trust me, it’s a shame producing six hours worth of parts, then later being told they all had to get canned. That’s time, money wasted—pure counterproductivity. 

I’ve learned how important it is to prepare. I remember during training in that industry, an instructor asked, what fruits will my work yield? What is my offering?

“Skill Sets To Be Utilized”

These are a few skill sets I’ve learned over the years from invaluable experiences. Added to my personal brand, from the fruits of my labor.

Wings Too Sore to Soar

Society makes me feel like a bird in a cage. Or so it seems. Being confined in this human body, there are limits. And if I were to feel free as a bird outside his cage, would I be able to spread my wings and fly.

My mom agreed she would accompany me out of town, possibly for a couple days. It’s my three day “birthday” weekend, and I wanted to hike a mountain. I chose Sunshine Peak, a Colorado 14er located in the San Juan mountain range.

We blasted towards Sunshine around 9pm, taking 285 South. The sky held a half-moon as the road began to become narrow through the mountainous silhouette. I would lose internet connection during the drive, thinking to myself, damn, I should have downloaded a playlist through my Spotify premium. As we were near Fairplay, it became an open road with the distant mountains surrounding the area where one side, the moon gleamed, and on the left side, deep in the darkness, lightning flashed.

We passed the Lake San Cristobal sign along Cinnamon Pass, shortly after the GPS had us parked in the shoulder lane of the rocky (County Road), CR30. It was 2:30am, and I had already driven 5 and a half hours. The light of the car could luminate for only so far, being pitch black as far as the eye can see. I opened the door and it was very chilly and damp, reminding me of the desired hoodie I should’ve brought. I used my neck lamp to see if there was a clear path—no luck. So we remained parked as my mom and I grabbed a little shut eye for a few hours.

Along Cinnamon Pass

Lake San Cristobal sign… during the day

It was 6:00am, and I continued west on CR30, through its rocky canyon road. It wasn’t for another 45 minutes until we actually reached the base and campground of Sunshine Peak.

The reality was my front thighs were sore and cramping up. If I were to hike, that’d been a long wait for my mom. It was already 6:45am and I—projected—wouldn’t be back in the car until 6:45pm if I were to hike Sunshine. In other words, maybe this bird’s wings were too sore to fly.

The base of Redcloud Peak & Sunshine Peak

We continued west through the bulges of rock. Note, if you ever plan to drive on CR30, make sure you drive a 4-wheeler—something like a Jeep. It was the end of the road, as we arrived near a bowl—a valley known as American Basin of the San Juan mountain range. It was surreal and had a Swiss look to it. 

In This Sugary Installment

Eternal Raven At Last is the sixth installment of the mericanDREAM saga following: CYBER CIRCLES & A COSMIC HEART, Palace of the Sun, The Little Lunar Album, Wolves Are Very Emotional, and IINDEPENDENCE. In this sugary installment, Matthew A Cruz aka mericanDREAM spews out over 3,000 words throughout the album, enunciating the word DREAM just well over 60 times. 

Artwork drawn by Matthew A Cruz, featuring The Raven, King DREAM as a Lion and The Unicorn of Duchess

The story is going to be a smoothly paved trail for the listener to stroll on. As it is implied, there the Raven, Her Majesty, who carries a message from world to world. DREAM who is king, must hearken from those he crosses paths with. Yet, if  DREAM is brave enough to play matador towards fate as the bull, he might wake up in a place where he does not desire to be.

As the writer, Matthew shares values, illuminating through biblical theology and Greek mythology. A hint of astronomy, in a discography-continuity embracing the sun, the moon, the sky and the stars. In the depths of Hollywoo—an original reference from NETFLIX’s BoJack Horseman—DREAMREALM is inhabited by animals. DREAM refers to himself as a leo, a lion. The occurring deuteragonist, possible protagonist (depending on how the listener interprets the album), the Raven is personified as a beautiful and mystical woman who is as God’s favorite messenger. Will she scream NEVERMORE to king DREAM.

June 20th, the album is scheduled to be released on all major platforms such Spotify, iTunes, YouTube Music, Tidel, Amazon, Pandora, and more.

My Personal Glimpse on Making an Album

It was a pleasant experience working on this album, even though looking back now, it felt so brief. Is my music mainstream worthy? Nah. And I’m okay with that. I did attempt to engage with other artists, even featured a young and pretty violinist, and an energetic lyrical freestylist—compensating them for their work. I hired my buddy, using my Canon EOS Rebel T7 with the 75-300 millimeter lens to take the photo of me for the album cover. He did a great job. Yes, I’m aware of the practicality in making an album while juggling between two to three jobs is fiercely difficult, but it is well worth it. Marketing for an audience—the proper audience—will come in time. Maybe. The focus was… to create and properly engage.

Desmond Teal focusing the Canon EOS Rebel T7 with the 75-300 millimeter lens on the stand for a clear and quality shot.

Drafting compositions in a melodic manner, including structuring and identifying chords as themes definitely helped in creating an impactful story. I scaled between defining characters and settings to what does their theme sound like. 808s and percussion lacked more than the melody, as I heavily depended on Splice samples—though I did manipulate the module, pitch, or length of the samples for a more original feel. Also for the bass, I didn’t spend nearly as much time as I did for the chord structure of the (treble clef) melody.

I maintained the mythological ethos, carried by the lyrics I wrote. The story is going to be a clear trail for the listener to stroll on. Yet, the moral of the story may vary between each listener.

The dynamic vibrations of this album—utilized resources included a community center grand piano, a trumpet, a three stringed and out of tuned violin (that I attempted to play), an acoustic guitar, ikea tall chairs and a support beam for drums, primarily recorded by an ICE snowball mic, and processed by FL Studios software. 

Matthew A Cruz aka mericanDREAM recoding the vocals, normally planting the mic between a stack of books inside a conference/library room

The work does take a toll on the mind and body, and my personal freetime. I couldn’t dedicate myself to the gym as much. I couldn’t calibrate myself properly for my professional side. It is very taxing on the mind when you take your craft very seriously. But like the old adage says, don’t take yourself too seriously. I feel when I needed to, I lightened up. I try to do different activities, disrupting certain thought patterns. I explored my social circle, even met some people I feel are a positive addition in my life. And I continued to be a fan of things that have nothing to do with my craft. From Mid-December to the end of May, the process has been absorbent..

Matthew A Cruz aka mericanDREAM and the facility cat having a jam session.

A Look into the Creative Headspace

It’s a fresh start for a new year, meanwhile I’ve been in a creative headspace since mid-December. Since 2018, I’ve released an album every year—reflecting my trials and tribulations, my enlightened moments, and my underlying environment. 2023, through thick and thin my process is more thorough, drafting concepts and character outlines then creating melodic themes for each main character and settings. At times, I chart chords and notes using a grand piano at my condominium community center or by simply using FL Studio’s piano roll at home. Once I’ve figured out the chords to use for theme, I rearrange the notes and plug-ins (basically instruments and sounds). In layman’s terms, the foundation of my pieces are the instrumentals I produce.

I also sketch out my characters, normally using a Pilot G2 or a BIC Atlantis pen and some Sharpie markers. During character development, there’s a particular image in my head, but it’s never clear—like staring at a frost window. My recent method for clarification is using Pinterest to conjure up the most relatable ideas, a lot of times I sketch what I see, then add on from it. From there I’d take a photo of the sketch from my phone and photoshop it—maybe change the background, or add a filter. Once I complete a picture of the character, I listen to my compositions to see if it's a match, if it compliments each other well. 

My lyrical development process is extremely slow and naturally more convoluted then my composing process. For this album project, I want my voice to be clearer and my lyrical rhythm, fluid and smooth—smooth sailing. My lyrics will continue to be mythologically dynamic, however I want to create stronger continuity for the story. While listening to the entire album, it needs to make sense for the audience. Sometimes, being sporadic keeps the interest, but it needs to happen in the direction of the story. 

Its a balance though, there must be structure yet there needs to be room for creativity. Now speaking work/life balance, depending on the work, at times I need to give my undivided attention to the task at hand. It’s the same when I’m composing art, my mind, my heart have to be present in the story to synthesize the desired vibrations I want to share with my audience. 

This is my hobby, my life’s work. Producing a yearly album is my M.O.